23 Pounds Down

Well, technically 23.4 pounds down. I’m too mentally exhausted to be excited about it the way I should be. So many life changes happening and coming soon that I think a big part of my loss this past week is stress. Not eating enough by a long shot. Yeah, I finally hit the 20-pound milestone but that wasn’t really the way to do it. Despite not hitting my Fitbit step goal consistently, I have been plenty active in regard to lifting heavy things, HIIT, and being bendy. So I’m proud of myself for that. But I have to eat more than just oranges and nuts.

Having a huge tea in the morning with a wake-up wrap is going to be my regular thing. And I’m going to make salmon for dinner tonight. That’s a start. I have to eat. But I will admit that I find it interesting how now that I barely drink coffee, I’m losing. SO many of my day calories came from coffee. Wow. Anyway, enough rambling. No more skipping lunch and dinner. Living off snacks isn’t wise. The end.

Saw the Doctor

Today is the beginning of another try at losing in a different way. Using IIFYM to calculate my calories and macros was a bad move. Why? Because I’m obese, not just overweight. So I’m back to less calories per day. 1700 cal/day for now. Super limited carbs — none from bread/rice/pasta for 2 weeks. Since I’ll be losing water weight, and am so effing fat, she’s convinced I have the potential to lose 20 pounds in 2 weeks if I exercise and follow the diet. I can still have coffee, but with almond/skim milk and stevia. I know I drink way too much coffee though so I had already made my one and only NewYear’s resolution to drink no more than 24 oz, eventually getting to a max of 12oz.  Why? Because I have been drinking like 48 – 60 ounces almost every day.

As for medications, I’m on a water pill (HCTZ 25mg) because my BP was a little high. I got a b12 shot and a lipo shot lol. Supposedly they do something. I don’t know if I really buy it. We talk about phentermine in 2 weeks if my BP is lower. It was lower than the other day when I had the anxiety attack so she’s optimistic. Oh, why did I have an anxiety attack at the beginning of the first appointment? Because I got on the scale and weighed more than I have ever weighed in my life. Ever. EVER. It was way too much to handle and I just broke. But yeah. I’m okay now. Optimism. Mindfulness. Sleep.

Honestly, I feel 10x better today now that I’ve gone. Plus, I slept for 12hours last night! And the past few months have been so stressful. The last month was depress-o-rama. I’m meditating again and drinking water. OMG WATER. I might have had like 5 bottles in December. The whole month. Yeah. I wasn’t taking care of myself after Bob died but now I’m getting back to normal. Now I plan to have that many each day at least. And I will exercise at least 5 days per week– even if it’s just a 15min HIIT thing. If I do that and hit my 10k step goal, I’ll lose like I did before.

So here’s to the future. Which I will not obsess over. I will do this one day at a time.

Doctor, Doctor Time

I have a doctor’s appointment set for 1/9 that I”m trying to get rescheduled for this week (today if someone cancels). Wish me luck. I hated having to reschedule because of work.  I just want hard data to record, analyze, and use for a solid plan to lose some damned weight. I hope I’m still as healthy as I was at last check-in. I hope eating meat again hasn’t made things worse than I realized. That’s my fear. I’m omnivorous at heart. I love veggies, but I love pot roast, too. And chicken with mushrooms and asparagus is my happy place on lifting days.

I’m at the point where I’m ready to try Qsymia or something similar. Qsymia would be good because it’s a combo of phentermine (appetite suppressant) and topiramate (prevents migraines and seizures). I’m fat and I get migraines — especially at work and when gaming. So I feel like this would be a win for me. But what do I know without talking to te doctor first? Actually a lot. Usually my doctors are impressed by my insanely anal researching and agree with my assessment. Obsessive personality power! Yeah, it’s why I’m asking for Qsymia and not Contrave. Crazy people don’t need Contrave making them crazier. 

Anyway, at my weight, I could realistically lose 10 pounds a month safely for about 6 months. That much I know. So let’s hope things go well when I finally get to the doctor. Waiting sucks.

Meh x100

Someone mentioned having a case of “the fuck-its” and I think I’m almost there. I’m doing stronglifts 5×5 and trying to walk the dog more on off days. I wanted to see if just lifting would be enough. It’s not. Yes, the muscle is there. Yes, I’m stronger. No, I’m not really getting smaller. And I worry that eating this much — even though it’s at a deficit– is part of the problem. I feel like I should go back to eating 1500-1800 cal/day. Like maybe a “healthy” deficit isn’t what I need. Maybe I need a drastic one, regardless of my weight-lifting obsession. For now. I’ll just add 30min pilates on off days and see if that helps. And drop from 2635cal to 2300. I don’t know. It all feels like bullshit and a waste of time.

WTF Sugar?!

How the hell have I gone over my sugar already?!!

 

Your Food Diary For:

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Breakfast Calories

kcal
Carbs

g
Fat

g
Protein

g
Sodium

mg
Sugar

g
Dunkin Donuts – Pumpkin Swirl Hot Coffee Xl, 14 oz 170 38 0 3 95 36
Land O’lakes – Yellow American Cheese, Deli 28 g, 28 g 100 2 9 5 400 2
Bagel – Bagel Plain, 1 bagel (98 g) 150 48 2 10 430 6
Market – Banana, 1 banana 105 27 0 1 1 14
525 115 11 19 926 58
Elevensies
     
Lunch
Allrecipes – Mini Meatloaf, 2 mini loaf 508 33 29 30 1,290 25
Broccoli Fresh Steamed – Generic, 1 cup 62 12 1 6 64 2
570 45 30 36 1,354 27
Afternoony Noms
     
Dinner
     
Darktime Noms
     
Totals 1,095 160 41 55 2,280 85
Your Daily Goal 2,850 183 124 250 2,300 76
Remaining 1,755 23 83 195 20 -9
Calories

kcal
Carbs

g
Fat

g
Protein

g
Sodium

mg
Sugar

g
*You’ve earned 215 extra calories from exercise today

Meeting Macros

It’s really, really hard. So far I’m not doing well. I might need to invest in some Ensure or SlimFast– something! Time to research nutritional meal shakes. I have some FitMiss. Maybe I need to bring it to work. I’m sure as hell not drinking it at home.

 

Your Food Diary For:

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Breakfast Calories

kcal
Carbs

g
Fat

g
Protein

g
Sodium

mg
Sugar

g
Dunkin Donuts – Pumpkin Swirl Hot Coffee Xl, 14 oz 170 38 0 3 95 36
Land O’lakes – Yellow American Cheese, Deli 28 g, 28 g 100 2 9 5 400 2
Bagel – Bagel Plain, 1 bagel (98 g) 150 48 2 10 430 6
Add Food

420 of 813 88 11 18 925 44
Lunch
Rotini – Pasta, 2 oz 200 41 1 7 10 2
Pesto – Pesto, 25 g 80 1 8 3 105 0
Giant – Shrimp, 3 shrimp 34 0 0 8 81 0
Add Food

314 of 813 42 9 18 196 2
Dinner
Add Food

0 of 813      
Snacks
Add Food

0 of 270      
Totals 734 130 20 36 1,121 46
Your Daily Goal 2,709 174 118 237 2,300 73
Remaining 1,975 44 98 201 1,179 27
Calories

kcal
Carbs

g
Fat

g
Protein

g
Sodium

mg
Sugar

g
*You’ve earned 74 extra calories from exercise today

Birthday Gluttony & Goodness

So yesterday was my birthday. Every year, I recommit to treating myself better than the year before. I look at my successes and failures and plan accordingly. I believe in attainable goals. The crazy thing is that I often meet my goals, but with things that must be maintained, I start slipping. Like eating healthier for 3 months then slipping then getting back to it again. Or losing 30 pounds and regaining 20… The struggle is real!

So good stuff first, I restarted the Zombies Run 5k app with a friend and am looking forward to continuing. She has an addictive personality so I know that even if I slack, she’ll be texting me about it so I will do it not just for myself but as a good buddy to her as well.

The bad… I went WAY over my sodium yesterday and I can feel it today. And I didn’t have nearly enough protein.

Totals 2,437 305 101 125 5,882 58
Your Daily Goal 3,923 253 171 344 2,300 98
Remaining 1,486 -52 70 219 -3,582 40
Calories

kcal
Carbs

g
Fat

g
Protein

g
Sodium

mg
Sugar

g
*You’ve earned 1,288 extra calories from exercise today

Dear Internet,

I have been having peanuts for lunch for the past 4 workdays. On a good day, I might drink a 24oz bottle of water. Everyday, there’s a huge cup of DD coffee for breakfast.

Seriously. This is not helping my weightloss goals.

I went about 2 or 3 weeks without weighing myself. Guess what. I gained 9 pounds. Fuck.That.Noise.

People who are too busy to eat should be rewarded by LOSING weight. Not gaining it. If I’m gonna be running around stressed all the time, I should at least be able to buy smaller clothes.

Mmmmm Salads

OMG Why does Wendy’s have such amazing salads? The BBQ Chicken Ranch Salad* was my jam for a while. Yes, my jam. Anyway, That was a salad I could eat for lunch every day — but without the bacon. I don’t know why, but chicken and bacon on a salad just seems like overkill. When I was a vegetarian, I’d ask them to make it without the chicken and bacon and it was still amazing. I lost a lot of weight around that time… hmmm.  Nope. Can’t do that again.

Moving on…

So now Wendy’s has this Mediterranean Power Salad* that is to live for. OMG. Great greens, chicken, chickpeas, hummus, feta, quinoa… some other stuff. All the protein. All the flavor. All the veggies fo dat ass. I swear. Did I mention the flavor?

It’s also worth noting that both of these salads are so good that I almost never use the dressing packet that comes with them. I don’t get crazy about recipes usually — especially not from a fast food place — but this is seriously worth sharing. Both of these salads are now my go-to lunches for when I forget to pack leftovers. The nutrition specs aren’t bad at all. My caloric restrictions and protein needs are being met when I have them. I wish I could have one for lunch and one for dinner every day, but that’s just not practical. Ah well.

 

*Yeah, I suck at remembering the real names of the salads but I know I’m close.

Weight Loss Foods

I’ve been watching this guy’s elliptical workout videos for a bit; I finally read his site. It has so much useful, motivational information! Check out  this diet info page on NowLoss.com. He raises a lot of logical points.

You’d have to eat 9 medium sized carrots (and good luck trying to do that) to get same amount of calories contained in a bag of M&M’S

I don’t agree with every piece of advice, but most of it is pretty awesome. Mostly it inspires me of what to eat when I can’t think of anything to eat. Oh, but there’s no way in hell I’m drinking V8. Ew… Yuck… Blech!

Now I just need to hurry and get an elliptical machine for home.

#GymsAintCheap #PayOnceWorkoutForLife #OkayImJustCheap