Saw the Doctor

Today is the beginning of another try at losing in a different way. Using IIFYM to calculate my calories and macros was a bad move. Why? Because I’m obese, not just overweight. So I’m back to less calories per day. 1700 cal/day for now. Super limited carbs — none from bread/rice/pasta for 2 weeks. Since I’ll be losing water weight, and am so effing fat, she’s convinced I have the potential to lose 20 pounds in 2 weeks if I exercise and follow the diet. I can still have coffee, but with almond/skim milk and stevia. I know I drink way too much coffee though so I had already made my one and only NewYear’s resolution to drink no more than 24 oz, eventually getting to a max of 12oz.  Why? Because I have been drinking like 48 – 60 ounces almost every day.

As for medications, I’m on a water pill (HCTZ 25mg) because my BP was a little high. I got a b12 shot and a lipo shot lol. Supposedly they do something. I don’t know if I really buy it. We talk about phentermine in 2 weeks if my BP is lower. It was lower than the other day when I had the anxiety attack so she’s optimistic. Oh, why did I have an anxiety attack at the beginning of the first appointment? Because I got on the scale and weighed more than I have ever weighed in my life. Ever. EVER. It was way too much to handle and I just broke. But yeah. I’m okay now. Optimism. Mindfulness. Sleep.

Honestly, I feel 10x better today now that I’ve gone. Plus, I slept for 12hours last night! And the past few months have been so stressful. The last month was depress-o-rama. I’m meditating again and drinking water. OMG WATER. I might have had like 5 bottles in December. The whole month. Yeah. I wasn’t taking care of myself after Bob died but now I’m getting back to normal. Now I plan to have that many each day at least. And I will exercise at least 5 days per week– even if it’s just a 15min HIIT thing. If I do that and hit my 10k step goal, I’ll lose like I did before.

So here’s to the future. Which I will not obsess over. I will do this one day at a time.

Doctor, Doctor Time

I have a doctor’s appointment set for 1/9 that I”m trying to get rescheduled for this week (today if someone cancels). Wish me luck. I hated having to reschedule because of work.  I just want hard data to record, analyze, and use for a solid plan to lose some damned weight. I hope I’m still as healthy as I was at last check-in. I hope eating meat again hasn’t made things worse than I realized. That’s my fear. I’m omnivorous at heart. I love veggies, but I love pot roast, too. And chicken with mushrooms and asparagus is my happy place on lifting days.

I’m at the point where I’m ready to try Qsymia or something similar. Qsymia would be good because it’s a combo of phentermine (appetite suppressant) and topiramate (prevents migraines and seizures). I’m fat and I get migraines — especially at work and when gaming. So I feel like this would be a win for me. But what do I know without talking to te doctor first? Actually a lot. Usually my doctors are impressed by my insanely anal researching and agree with my assessment. Obsessive personality power! Yeah, it’s why I’m asking for Qsymia and not Contrave. Crazy people don’t need Contrave making them crazier. 

Anyway, at my weight, I could realistically lose 10 pounds a month safely for about 6 months. That much I know. So let’s hope things go well when I finally get to the doctor. Waiting sucks.

Oh, Fiber!

psyllium_seed So a friend of mine is a nutritionist; a very close friend who knows my eating habits well and used to be on MyFitnessPall with me. So she knows I don’t get enough fiber, and that I don’t get enough vitamins and minerals in general. So she advised me to get some psyllium husk capsules since Metamucil is full of extra color and flavor nonsense.

Since taking the psyllium, I’ve noticed my poop is better. It’s still poop though so it’s not like I’m excited about it. I’m supposed to feel fuller longer but I’m not totally sure that part is kicking in yet. My appetite fluctuates. I can have coffee in the morning and not be hungry until 2-3pm. I’m also not taking 3 capsules 3 times per day. I’m working up to it. Sometimes I’m lucky if I take it twice. So we shall see.

I have to chug down a glass of water with it, so at least it’ll help with my water intake. Apparently the psyllium soaks up the water in my stomach, so if my stubborn arse doesn’t drink enough water, I’ll regret it.